Parenting Plan and Child-related Budget Advice


Questioner

Hello, Since half a year, my ex-partner and me live separately. We have a daughter of 3 years old. During the breakup process we went to a counselor for half a year. The last few sessions of the counseling were used to make the parenting plan. At the last session, My ex said that she would write down on paper what we talked about during the talks. After 2 months that she didn't do it and said that we was too busy, I went back to the counselor by myself to get help to write down the plan. Now everything is written down, I sent it to my ex-partner to invite her to read it, make it complete with her very welcome suggestions and finish it down in a way that works for everyone. Now i sent the plan about 5 months ago and she still didn't read it. i asked her regularly if she could please have a look at it, and give feedback. She keeps answering that she has too much in her head, while I think that the co-parenting plan should be a priority. (Just for info, she wanted to break up, so it's not even a way to keep the relationship back or something). Do you know if there is any possible step to get this parenting plan done without ending up into legal discussions (i tried formal emails, asked on phone, face to face...she always answers : sorry i'll do it tomorrow!- --since 5 months...). Now, another point, since a few weeks she says that we shouldn't share the child budget anymore. Our agreement is that we do co-parenting 50/50. We both pay all costs 50/50. Our daughter lives half half with both of us. It seems logical to me that this money should also be split then as the costs are equal. I do understand that this money is calculated on her salary because our daughter is registered at her address. But does that mean that she has to get the money alone? My ex says that my income is too high, that if our daughter was registered at my place we wouldn't get anything at all (which I'm actually not even sure because I work freelance, so after i deduct insurances, pension, etc , i'm pretty sure i'm under the threshold...). Does this argument have any value anyway? Or is it more logical to look at the fact that the costs are shared 50/50? I hope that this message wasn't too long, but I thought that it could be handy to be a bit detailed. Any feedback and guidance would be very welcome because I'm not really sire about the most logical steps to follow. Thanks! M

Lawyer

There can't be an official break-up without a signed parenting plan. If your aim is not to have an official divorce, you might go without. The child budget is based on the costs you make. I have worked with learning cases and writing down arguments before.

Questioner

Hello Wijnand, Thank you for your feedback. We were not married, so we don't need an official divorce. But we do need a parenting plan, right? Thanks and best regards

Lawyer

If you were registered partners and you acknowledged the kid, the parental pass plan is obligatory. Did you huddle, the authority is with the mother. Then, a parenting plan isn't required. If you want to receive the child-related budget together, you can request to be a allowance partner. You can register for that at the tax authorities. Though the site is English, I can give guidance in filling out the forms.

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